Naked Dinner (Then):
Billie Holiday, tea light candles on a plastic table, cheap wine, some kind of chicken, a salad, maybe a side, paper napkins across bare laps, trying to eat with a straight face.
Smiling.
Abandoning dinner.
A+
* * * * * *
Naked Dinner (Now):
WordGirl theme song, pendant lights over the kitchen counter, expensive milk, some kind of chicken, no salad, maybe a side (though it won’t be appreciated), plastic place mat, giggling 4 year-old trying to keep a straight face.
ME: I asked you to turn the TV off before…where’s your dress?
ONE: What dress?
ME: Where’s. Your. Dress?
ONE: On the porch.
ME: You’d better have your panties on.
ONE: Why? I don’t need panties to eat.
ME: GO. PUT. YOUR CLOTHES. BACK. ON.
A jump. A whoosh.
Shrieking.
Abandoning dinner.
F
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Did she bend over and do the Ace Ventura butt talk thingy and ask for a breath mint? No? So, #2 is a freak? Blast! Was hoping it wasn’t true.
We always have the “NOW” naked dinner at our house…when Gabe (my oldest boy) turned 5 I finally made it a rule that he had to have underwear on at least. :)
What is it with kids and underwear – or lack thereof?
Both of my girls eschew undies. Miss D., however, used to take off her clothes AND dance on the coffee table. Which worried my husband about her future choice of career.
My 11 year old would walk around naked all the time. I think it’s something you practically have to beat into them.
Hopefully the jumping and whooshing didn’t cause any spilling, mopping and cleaning!
OMG! What is with these kids? LOL. The post and the comments that followed, hilarious!
I mean, she does have a point about the panties. How do they know this stuff.
You have SUCH a more interesting life than I do. I say Naked Dinner Fridays for All!
My daughter I swear was allergic to clothes or something when she was younger, every time I turned around she was naked. Now I have to fight her to leave her shoes and socks on. I picked her up at school the other day and her cubby had 3 pairs of socks and some tights in it. At least now she wears clothes to dinner except for an especially messing dinner at home she will go with out a shirt.
The before was so long ago I cannot even think back that far, was there such a thing that was acutally fun and did not involve telling someone to get dressed.
At least she didn’t claim that she saw Mommy and Daddy do naked dinners. THAT would have been embarrassing.
Excellent. Looks like you have a “FREE SPIRITED” one on your hands. ;o)
Belly is sitting here wondering why I am laughing at the computer. It is amazing how things change, isn’t it?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Hahahaha I just LOVE your post today!! LOL
Right now my 5 year old has transformer underwear so he’s happy to keep them on!
It sounds like my house. The two and four year old take turns. Naked time is not exclusive to dinner though. Lucky me??!! :[
LOL!!
{Response to the comment you left my page-Those Kids are my Niece, Nephew and Cousins :). I am also a Nanny(to a 3yo boy and baby girl due ANY day now!!), but haven’t posted any of those pics yet).
:)
So funny!!!!! Love it.
LOL “Because the rule is you have to have clothes on to eat dinner.” “I don’t care if you don’t want to eat dinner, you still have to put your clothes on for the dinner you won’t eat”
I think you’ve inspired me to have a OLD naked dinner soon before I give birth to my first…..minus cheap wine. And salad.
I think I told you I used to give letter grades to my days when I wrote in my journals as a younger person. I love the grading system here. That’s how mine went: A+ or F were the most-used options. Also, the phrase “you better have your panties on” is tossed around in our house on a weekly, maybe daily, basis. I shudder to think of all the places her three-days-without-a-bath nether parts have been in our home…
P.S. Your grades also reminded me of a thing that used to make me laugh myself silly a few years ago that you can still find on the Internet. I don’t want to post a link to it in your comments section, but if you haven’t ever seen the “I am better than your kids” commentary on kids’ artworks, you should Google it up.
That sounds like a lovely phase I get to look forward to….although her jiggily nakes arse does make me laugh out loud:)
Word UP!!
Post: A+
hahahahaha! What is it with kids taking their clothes off. If my 4yo doesn’t feel like napping in the afternoon, I can always count on finding him wearing something different than what I put him to bed in when I come get him. He’s never tried to eat dinner naked though. Yet…
Perfectly graded! ;) SO funny!
When my grand daughter was 2 years old she was given 30 minutes a day for naked time. No one said anything or made a big deal she just ran around naked. This was my daughters idea and it worked out pretty well. She gave up naked time when she was 6.
Naked time never really works out well for anyone in this house. Especially me, becasue it usually means : 1. either I have to give up time that I could be watching E! Telelvsion or reading a book, or sleeping… or 2: chase a kid with poo smeared all over his ass. I give naked time an F-.
We actually strip our kids down to their diapers for mealtimes so I guess I’m on the other side of the naked dinner argument. I just hate changing their clothes umpteen times a day and they’re slobs.
Hilarious.
Don’t know why I’m so uptight, but I have a mandatory panties at the table rule, too. Maybe because boys lose interest in food fast if there’s something to play with at the table.
hahahaha … I shudder at the thought of finding one or both my boys naked at the dinner table one day, especially since they eat food dropped on their laps all the time.
OH NO! LOL Too funny!
Yesterday I sat on my front porch with my 4yo. He was in the chair next to me, butt raised high in the air, full camouflage undies for all the neighbours to see. I suppose I should be happy that he was at least wearing underwear.
Christine LaRocque´s last [type] ..Pausing
Reminds me of the Seinfeld episode w/ good naked and bad naked.
Very, very true! My daughter seems to always be naked.
Anjie´s last [type] ..July 2010 Pictures
The story of my life! Both children feel it perfectly acceptable to abandon clothing at any time. What do ya do, except laugh?
Misty, Southern Belle Mama´s last [type] ..Today Im the Worlds Worst Mother
Things sure change after having kids, huh?!
SuziCate´s last [type] ..Not Exactly Musical- But I’ll Toot My Horn AnyWay!
LOL. Nice before/after kids post. There are so many of these moments I think parents can clog up the Internet with it.
Justine´s last [type] ..Hi- my name is Justine and I am a…
Clothing really is optional. As kids so willingly show us.
Amber´s last [type] ..On a Whim
That is not an F! Only a B…Bare Butt Baby. :D I have a picture of Jesse wearing her apron and chef hat and every body knows that she is naked underneath. It’s hanging on the wall at her Great Grandpa’s house and it makes people smile when they hear the story behind it. Naked babies are cute! I’ve never eaten dinner naked. I may have to add it to my list before I get too much more jiggly.
Sara´s last [type] ..Barnacle Balls
Words you should never have to mutter to your girl “You’d better have your panties on.” Hopefully you don’t have to say this to her when she’s a teenager.
Allison @ Alli ‘n Son´s last [type] ..My Bloggy Buddy
Dare I say like mother like daughter :-)
Nicely played!
Always a pleasure when I read your blog. This is too true.
Rudri Patel´s last [type] ..I Am Staying Here Forever
So happy that I’m not the only one with a persistently naked child. I may just invest in duct tape and call it a day.
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