There are things that surprise me with happiness, things I push myself to try so I don’t miss out, and things I search to find happiness in. And then there are things that I know would make me happy that I rarely acknowledge because I’ve either tried them (repeatedly) and failed, or still haven’t had the guts to attempt.
These are the things I keep tucked inside until I read something like this:
And then I’m inspired to come clean. Because if I KNEW I wouldn’t fail, happiness might look a little different.
I would have more babies.
I would go to the next class reunion.
I would sing a duet with my husband at a karaoke bar.
I would turn my entire backyard into a vegetable garden.
I would perform with Mortified.
I would invite the family members who hate me over for dinner.
I would tell them how their words shaped my life and decisions.
I would stop blaming them.
I would ask to start our relationships over.
I would ride a skateboard as fast as I could.
I would travel the world.
I would give away more than I spent.
I would say, “I’m sorry,” for the last time, because this time he’d say, “I forgive you.”
I know some of these will remain in the dreamy haze of my ruminations, but the others? I will attempt them again and again until the day comes when I can attach a little !!! tag to them, and claim their happiness.
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What makes you
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!!! = Intentional Happiness
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{ 34 comments }
Oh interesting post – if I knew I could not fail I’d do IVF and have another baby. But other than that, something totally outside my control, I kind of like the idea of never knowing what the outcome will be, which makes me feel proud as and when I do pluck up the courage to try something new.
What a wonderful post….
I’d stop blaming my stepdaughter everytime she does, says, looks or acts like her Mom. I think she’s old enough to know right from wrong but I have to remember the example she’s been taught for the first 12 years of her life was a horrible one.
Futureblackmail´s last [type] ..MEASURING STICK
IF I knew I wouldn’t fail I would have choosen a different profession; Interior Decorator or a Lawyer. But I’m happy with my life so !!! for that.
Jen´s last [type] ..Some childrens parents
More babies, definitely. And I would have done that third year of University in France. And been a librarian the first time around. But it’s a good point — it’s braver when you don’t know you won’t fail.
Great post – love the new angle here.
If I knew I would not fail, I would move to France, learn French, hone my photography skills, meditate and yoga daily, quit my job and become a SAHM, go to BlogHer and not feel guilty for leaving my family behind on my birthday, go to BlogHer and truly have a good time and not worry about what others may think of me when they meet me in person and write a memoir. You know, the usual…
But mostly there’s plenty of !!! in my life now. A shift here, an adjustment there in perspective is all I need to know that I’m right where I want to be. :)
Justine´s last [type] ..This is so wrong
Hmm…
I rarely worry about whether I will fail when I try something. Nor do I worry about how I will be perceived.
As a consequence, there is not much that I would like to do that I have not attempted (well, I’d like to travel the world for a few years–but that’s a monetary/responsibility issue, not because I’m afraid).
Take the bull by the horns and live your life. It’s short and full of possibilities.
The Mother´s last [type] ..More Parental Nightmares
I think the fact that I can fail keeps me from doing stupid things more than it keeps me from doing uncomfortable things. If I could not fail I would erase poverty and homelessness.
Ooh, love this post! Oh, to be free of fear of failure… I look at my Kid and all I see are endless possibilities for him… I want to teach him to just give everything in life a shot – I’m trying to practice what I preach and *not* be a massive hypocrite. But if I knew I couldn’t fail? I’d go gangbusters on this universe.
So thoughtful. I love this post.
And…I have that magnet on my fridge. It’s supposed to motivate me but all it does is make me think crap, there’s a lot that I would do.
I so agree that I would do so much more if I knew that I wouldnt fail.
I fear of failing is a terrible terrible thing.
I am currently in a situation that I am going to give up on cause the alternative is to put it all out there and I would rather not for the fear of failing.
Excellent post!
soccermom´s last [type] ..Its that time again- SOCCER SEASON
I am so limited by my fear of failure. I never really pushed myself, challenged myself because of the fear of failure.
I think if there was one thing I could do knowing I wouldn’t fail, it would be to have my own restaurant and bar.
Cathy´s last [type] ..Drugs- Part 2- The Email
Oh goodness…if I couldn’t fail?!
I’d…
-write a novel or poem and send it to a publisher
-tell a close friend that I wanted to try a relationship with them
-speak to the guy who hurt me and ask him to open up to me properly
-learn to scuba dive and drive a car on mountain roads for long distances
-go to Africa/Afghanistan/anywhere in the world with lots of problems and tackle them
-apply for a US Green card…
Lots! Lots! Need to think longer on this one…
The Curious Cat´s last [type] ..Self-worth- wonderings
I love that on your list is reuniting with family. That would take so much courage.
Allison @ Alli n Son´s last [type] ..Blue Eyes and Moms Guest Post
This is a great list…I think I could come up with quite a long one…but one I’ve always had in my head since my high school AP Psych teacher asked us this very question was…President of the United States. What can I say? I like to be in charge. :)
Tiffany´s last [type] ..My Soldier Friends
Not sure I actually have one… but you know I support you on any of yours (except having those family members over for dinner).
Once again a post of yours pushes me to think past what I consider to be my little box!
I’m happy with my little life – but if I knew I couldn’t fail the list of things I’d try would be endless. But, the more I think about it, what’s to stop me from trying? Life is short and, according to my son, I’m more than half-way through it (ha! That’s what HE thinks!) so I might as well get out there and start trying some stuff!
Gigi´s last [type] ..Im just glad it didnt happen in the middle of the night while I was sleeping
“I would stop blaming them” — something I don’t know if I will ever be big enough to do with those people in my life (we all have them), but so totally worthy of a !!! tag. Knowing how hard it is to be stuck there, I hope you get to slap a !!! on this one, no matter how many tries it takes.
Contemporary Troubadour´s last [type] ..On organization
I don’t know if I’ll ever be big enough, either. But we can keep pushing each other towards it and maybe one day they’ll be !!!s we can look back on.
What a great post. (I love your list.)
Too many things I’d undertake – if I could!
BigLittleWolf´s last [type] ..Work of Art Episode 9- Natural Talents
Awesome Post. I so love your take on things.
Rudri Patel´s last [type] ..I Am Staying Here Forever
Great, thought-provoking post. I definitely have a fear of failing at a lot of things. I would have to think about what would be on my list. Having a second kid would probably be included. Definitely some job-related things.
facie´s last [type] ..If only I had taken pictures of my detoured drive
I could have almost listed the exact same things. I missed out on my !!! week this week. Been knitting. ha!
Sara´s last [type] ..ZhuZhus and Cats
Oh lady. My list would be so much longer. The fear of failure has shaped my life much more than actual failure has. That’s a sad thought, but acknowledging it is a step forward.
Kelly´s last [type] ..The magic of bubbles
Fear hinders us in so many ways. Yet the best part of life is when we do things in spite of the fear we feel. Here’s to you doing some of the stuff on your list, living like you know you can’t fail! ;)
Maria´s last [type] ..And so- it begins
I’ve already “failed” too many times to count. But they all add to my mystique, so I accept them with open arms.
I’ve racked up several rejections slips for novels, and I hope to rack up a ton more.
Nothing to be afraid of…
Shakespeare´s last [type] ..Missing You
I have a big stack of them too, and you know what? I feel the same way about them as you do. Disappointed, sure. But they motivate me to keep going. Only one person has to say “yes,” right? Good luck with your novels!
I’d stop all the freelancing and write my book. And then I’d let somebody besides my husband read it. And I wouldn’t need two bags of chocolate courage because success would be guaranteed. =>
Stacia´s last [type] ..Haiku Friday
Write your book anyway. It will be a success. You’re a fantastic writer. (And I’m not full of !!!, either. I love your writing.)
I love this post. Thanks for your honesty.
Now, you tackle your list and I’ll tackle mine. Agreed?
Mrs.Mayhem´s last [type] ..And YOU’RE Embarrassed by ME
This is a wonderful post! I would learn took fish and make pies. Oh and get published.
How about you come over and I’ll make you a pie? I make kick-ass apple with crumb topping. :)
This list is so beautiful, noble and amazing. Just. Like. You.
Jane´s last [type] ..Wrinkled Boobs- Lucky Charms Cakes And Helping You To Spell Flummoxed – Guess I’m Just A Wealth Of Information
LOVE this post. I saw the same sign just the other day somewhere I frequent. It makes me think of the things I would have done differently and the best part is that there weren’t many.
My favourite of your list: I would invite the relatives that hate me over for dinner. AND I would stop blaming them. I had not experienced relatives who hate me until recently. I’d like it to be better. But I dont know how to make it better and inviting them over for dinner? Wouldn’t work, we’ve tried some level of this and they simply aren’t interested. It makes me sad to think of it. Thanks for your honesty.
Shawna´s last [type] ..What Santa might bring to our house this year OR NOT
I don’t know how to make it better, either. The only time it ever works out well is when I’m imagining it. It makes me sad too. But we can dream, right?
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