You’re sitting in the car in front of a DSW, gripping the steering wheel, dizzy with (lack of) breath. Not because you’re about to go shoe shopping (which could totally make you panic, especially in this particular store), but because you’ve finished your shopping much faster than expected, and now have to face the rest of your day.
It’s crazy how a day can dictate breathing.
But recently that’s exactly what it’s been doing because you have too much on your to-do list and not enough checked off. Which is not your fault, because school was supposed to make things easier. More “you” time. More space to work on personal projects without the guilt. More time to…to what? You don’t know. And how is it that you have twelve hours alone per week and more left undone than you ever had when home all day with two small kids? And now? Now besides school there’s homework, and piano, and soccer, and girl scouts, and softball, and ballet, and the house, and the laundry, and the hot water that doesn’t work, and food that doesn’t replenish itself, and blah, blah, blah. Days. Life.
Sometimes, even when it’s all neatly arranged and listed in perfect squares on your calendar, you get a little lost. You know your way home. You know what you need to do. You know how to complete your tasks or ask for help or drop it all and take a nap. But when your brain stops skittering for one quiet moment, your vision starts to swim. Where are you in all of this? You? The person rushing around to keep it all together. Are you really keeping anything together? And are all of these things leading anywhere significant?
Where are you?
As it turns out, the parking lot of DSW is the perfect place to lose yourself. Because oftentimes you haven’t gone too far. In fact, in the middle of a desperate sigh you might just shake your head and look down and find yourself in the passenger seat. Neatly packaged, and perfectly described, in two very different boxes. One makes you look shinier and sexier than you remember seeing reflected back the last time you checked the rearview mirror.
And the other? So irresistibly comfortable that they’re already on your feet and need to be removed for photographic purposes.
Feeling a little lost today? Look down. Even if they’re not the shoes you dreamed you be wearing at this point in your life, they’re part of who you are. And sometimes, getting one little part of life into focus is enough. So breathe. Open your windows. Put on the music as loudly as you can handle. Start your car. And drive.
(And be sure to give yourself a hug. You’re awesome. It’s just your day that sucks.)
©2012 CEK. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
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