lines (then/now)

by ck on February 6, 2013

Lines (Then):

Hungry? No lines in front of Mom’s fridge.

A+

.

Looooong line to get a good seat at the Lilith Fair (in the years before Husband, as I’m sure he’d want clarified).

A+

.

Intimate line behind five bridesmaids to walk down the aisle.

If I remembered it at all, I’m sure it was an A+

.

The middle of a loud line with several hundred other kids in caps and gowns anxious to get as far away from college as possible.

I remember it and A+

                                     •         •

Lines (Now):

Linea Negra. It was supposed to be gone by 6 months post. I last gave birth over 19 months ago. I can still see it.

F

.

Waiting in the car for the mall play area to open and noticing all of the other moms/nannies in their cars with the same idea because it’s raining. Again.

F

.

Waiting outside of a preschool at 5am with two dozen other parents to get your kid on a waiting list. Not registered, just put on A WAITING LIST. Not for college, for PRESCHOOL.

So this is planet Arlington…

F

.

Hungry? Waiting in line at the grocery…I said NO. No, you may not eat that candy….what do you mean you already opened it? Put that magazine down, stop looking at the cover. Yes, you’re right. It does look like she’s naked but…Don’t hand your sister that balloon! It’s nice of you to share, but it’s not yours and she’s going to scream when it’s time to leave and…wait, how much did you say all this came to?

F-

©2009 CEK. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

 

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{ 16 comments }

D June 23, 2009 at 8:48 am

The lines for the mall play area and the preschool “waiting list” sound brutal. Seems as though the major difference between these two lists is that the first list is things you/”we” were doing for ourselves back in the day and the second is filled with things you/we/I am doing now, for them.

Ah, parenthood.

Futureblackmail June 23, 2009 at 9:06 am

What is it with the “registration lines” and the “waiting list” lines…and we all try and one up the other by getting there at the butt crack of dawn but it never works because someone totally put their tent up and slept there. Jerk.

TheKitchenWitch June 23, 2009 at 9:39 am

Have you been taking my children to the grocery store again?

Keyona June 23, 2009 at 10:36 am

“Yes, you’re right. It does look like she’s naked but…” =Priceless.

KathyB! June 23, 2009 at 10:57 am

Planet Arlington and Planet Danville, CA sound like they were on the same orbital trajectory. That is one of the things I prefer about living in Wake Forest. Although it’s so blasted humid here right now that I have trouble remembering these things.

Whoever said, “The more things change, the more they stay the same” did not have kids.

Gibby June 23, 2009 at 11:18 am

The hungover Saturday mornings then vs the hungover Saturday mornings now.

Not good.

The Mother June 23, 2009 at 11:43 am

Hee-hee.

Your “now” is my “then.”

If I want the kids out of the house on a rainy day, I throw them the car keys and a credit card.

That is the only way we lived through the ten days after IKE.

Jill June 23, 2009 at 11:47 am

haha! I rue the day when Spike is too big to sit in the grocery cart because he’s the one I’ll be fighting with at check out. Rocco will actually ask if he can have a treat and if I say no, he doesn’t take one (He whines about it incessantly and sometimes breaks down in tears, but he doesn’t take anything). Sometimes, at the grocery store or any store for that matter, I understand why people put their kids on leashes.

Unknown Mami June 23, 2009 at 2:13 pm

Ugh, I got linea negra too and it took forever to fade and I can still see it. They should call it linea ugly.

faemom June 23, 2009 at 6:00 pm

Then: Waiting in line at Disneyland, exchanging gossip and playing the game “would you be (do) . . . or . . .” A+
Now: Waiting in line at Disneyland, saying “No, you just ate lunch. No, you can’t have ice cream right now. No, we’re not getting out of line. Stop touching your brother. Don’t climb on the rail. Apologize for accidently bumping that woman. Yes, you have to wear your hat. You just had water. We all are tired. Yes, we’re staying in line. No, I don’t know what that smell is. Stop touching your brother. . . . ” F

Three Bay B Chicks June 23, 2009 at 6:37 pm

CK?? What is going on? Where have you been? I’ve missed you. I decided to seek you out in the blogosphere today. The days are long with my kids now that school is out. I needed a good laugh.

Seems like I came to the right place. Awesome post.

-Francesca

PS: I think you may have channeled my experiences at the grocery store!

Zeemaid June 23, 2009 at 9:58 pm

*LOL* I just love how you break down these things. It’s just so true. :)

naptimewriting June 23, 2009 at 10:29 pm

Seriously, the line at the grocery store. My mom once yelled at the checker, who was rolling her eyes as my brother and I both cried and begged, “It’s your fault for putting the damned candy right here. I should let ‘em cry until you get sense enough to put nothing but broccoli at the checkout line.”
They never did. And could they make the shelves just a bit farther from the cart, or do they enjoy busting four year olds for theft of gum?

Casey June 23, 2009 at 11:46 pm

They actually camp out at the preschool across the street. No fucking thank you. I’ll just murder my way down the waiting list instead.

insider53 June 24, 2009 at 12:12 am

How much of our time is wasted waiting in lines. You wait in line for everything today, you even have to wait in line just to get inside the coach outlet store before you wait in line to check out.

Yvonne Moss June 24, 2009 at 8:07 am

Last supermarket one…. unpaid for opened candy, little people comments of magazine covers, and the never ending fights over the balloons…. these are the moments I have pushed deep into the corners of my brain, till you grabbed them and brought them to the front. Don’t know if I should be overjoyed or stressed by memory!

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